Review: Reckless Rabbit

It appears that the Reckless Rabbit is a shoehorn-shaped vibrator with a hole in it for a penis.

That is, if you find intercourse to be incomplete without a power cord winding out from your and your partner's fused genitals, you may wish to purchase this product for the economical price of $12.75.

This product is also recommended by physicians for people whose genitals lack the natural ability to make distractingly loud buzzing noises during sex.

The product description reads:

You AND your partner will rave about the Reckless Rabbit because it is made to be shared! This uniquely designed, multi-speed vibrator will enchance your erotic interludes. It is quite versatile because simply by changing the direction of its placement on his cock, the naughty nodule and rambunctious rabbit can provide clitoral, testicular and/or anal stimulation. Take turns adjusting the hand held control to send a pulsating surprise to your partner's privates!

Unfortunately, it seems that the penile entryway is one-size-fits-all, meaning either that the whole thing is going to slide around like a motherfucker, or else you run the slight but serious risk of getting it stuck at the base of someone's penis, creating a vibrating cockring deathtrap.*

Doesn't "Reckless Rabbit" sound more like a character from a moralistic children's book than a sex toy? Perhaps the Reckless Rabbit could make his way into your panoply of bedroom tools along with his brethren the Usurious Tortoise, the Miserly Koala, and the Misanthropic Tree Squirrel.

Also, I wish people would say "naughty nodule" more often. I like to imagine that computer scientists say things like that when they have phone sex.


Click to buy!
*Every year, a small but embarrassed number of men lose their penises in cockring accidents. Always use a snap-on!